


A robotic intervention and a childish retaliation

by ItWasNotMe



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Fluffy banter, M/M, More Fluff, Prank-war, Robotic intervention, Tony's in over his head, clingy Tony-sort of.., jelly-cubed-robots, ketchup-explotions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-07
Updated: 2013-08-12
Packaged: 2017-12-10 17:42:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/788385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItWasNotMe/pseuds/ItWasNotMe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony wiggled his eyebrow while typing in a short command and suddenly the work shop was filled with some music of…Alvin and the chipmunks? What the fuck! <i>“I’m too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it huuurts..”</i>  Boomed out from the speakers. “I will kill Barton, taser be damned!” Tony declared when he finally got the music to shut up. “Steve?...Stop laughing Steve!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just a funny fluffy little plotbunny I had for you guys. =)
> 
>  
> 
> August 12, 2013: So I addes a short second chapter after a lovely comment from volfan about the prank war between Clint and Tony. Check it out!

”Hi To – ”

”Dummy no! Let go! Oh hi Steve.” Tony grumbled while he tried to reach his coffee which hovered just out of reach in the mechanic claw of his oldest robot. “This is the third time today! I don’t know what’s got into him. No! Not the sink! I will make you into a coat rack if you do that one more time, I’m not kidding!” Tony returned to one of his work benches were a live video-link with Steve had appeared. He huffed deeply and glared suspiciously into the too innocent blue eyes. 

“I hate to think you had anything to do with this Spangle bear….”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Steve stated calmly but couldn’t quite hide a smile when Butterfingers promptly handed Tony a tall glass of water and then chirped happily as he traded places with You who gave the surprised genius a double sandwich. 

“Don’t you start with me too. It smells like your patriotic doing a long way!” Tony chewed dutifully away on his sandwich in spite of his word. I mean you should not waste food right? 

“Steeeeeve! When are you coming back?” He whined between chews knowing just how much it would get to the blond.

“Tony…manners.” Tony only grinned mouth filled to the brink. “We’ll be home on Thursday in time for movie night if everything will go according to plans, like I told you yesterday and the day before that.” Steve smiled warmly at the now sulking man. “I miss you too Tony.”

“It’s really not fair. You’ve got Natasha and Bruce the only other sensible ones with you and I got stuck with Barton and Agent.”

“He’s got a name Tony.”

“Whatever…Thor is back home, Clint goes on my nerves and if I even so much as thinks about it I can see the taser-hand of his boyfriend twitching. I swear he is a mind reader that one!”

“You’re not that hard to read Tony.” Steve chuckled at the insulted expression he got. “If you know what to look after.” He added with a wink.

“Now we’re talking! So how about some cam-striptease huh?” Tony wiggled his eyebrow while typing in a short command and suddenly the work shop was filled with some music of…Alvin and the chipmunks? What the fuck! _“I’m too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it huuurts..”_ Boomed out from the speakers. “I will kill Barton, taser be damned!” Tony declared when he finally got the music to shut up. “Steve?...Stop laughing Steve!

“I’m sorry To – Bwahahaha! To-Tony. I’ve stopped laughing now…heh...” Steve got up from the floor where he consequently had ended up when he heard the music. “I don’t think it’s a good idea anyway, remember last time? When Clint found the video you taped and spread it on tumblr? I couldn’t go out on the streets for weeks after without being assaulted.” Tony winced at that but recovered quickly. “Well I guess as long as I’ve got the real deal I can be humble enough to share my “wealth” with the less fortuned ones. Let’s face it, your pecs and abs are to die for and – Dummy quit it!” Tony swatted at the insisting claw. “Let go! No Butterfingers! What the hell…Steeeeeve!” 

“Tony!”

.......

 

“Steve…”

“What happened Tony??”

“Steve, they kicked me out from my work shop. I had to swap to my phone. My own creations have turned against me!”

“Oh..”

“What do you mean with _Oh_?!”

“It’s 11:30 PM back home right?”

“What do that has to do with any – Oh..”

“Yeah, that’s about the time I usually come down to drag you kicking and screaming to bed.”

“It’s more using your puppy dog face-powers than dragging thank you very much. You’ve only carried me once..Alright twice then.” Tony muttered.

“I don’t have a puppy dog face!”

“Yes you do, and it’s a really evil thing to use. No one, robotic or human, can resist that face and you know it!” 

“I love you too Tony.” 

“At least somebody does, it’s obviously clear that my robots don’t anymore and I partly blame you!”

“Tony, they love you even more than me if possible.” Steve said smiling fondly at the rambling genius. “They just want your best.” 

“I have taken care of myself since I was 17 you know. I think I can manage a few days without you or that scary influence you have on my babies.” Tony pouted and blew a raspberry at the now twirling robots on the other side of the door.

“Really? You almost fooled me there with the 34 calls and 257 text messages I’ve received since this morning alone.”

“Those were for your benefit so you wouldn’t get homesick of course.”

“Of course Tony. Now go to bed and I might take home some of that salty licorice you like so much.”

“It’s not fair, you know all my weaknesses.”

“And you know mine.” Steve pointed out with a smile.

“That’s true, you do seem very fond of how I can deep-thr – “

“Tony!

“Aaaww you’re so cute when you’re blushing. Fine, sweet dreams Apple pie!” Tony smirked as the connection closed down and he got into the elevator up to his suite. He knew the perfect retaliation on Barton. _No one_ tampers with his music! “Jarvis?” 

“Yes Sir?”

“Be so kind and delete all of Agent Barton’s game history on the PS3 and Wii for me.

“Done Sir.”

“Perfect!”


	2. Vows of pranks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A prank-war could never end happily...or could it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just had to add this little thing after reading volfan's lovely comment on the first chapter about not wanting to be in the middle of a prank war between Tony and Clint. I hope you enjoy it!

”Help me!” A Tony-shaped blur rushed into the kitchen aiming for the sink where Steve where cleaning up from his breakfast. 

“What have you done this time?” Steve raised an eyebrow at the genius who now did his best to hide behind him while peering at the door with a stupidly large grin on his face.

“Hey what if I actually was in danger?” Tony turned innocent brown eyes against him and pouted his lower lip adorably. 

“Pfff…You _never_ ask for help when you really need it Tony. You’re too pigheaded.” Steve answered knowingly and turned off the faucet.

“Point!” Tony admitted and laughed brightly.

“So?”

“Sooo…?”

“Tony!”

“Fine!” Tony huffed and scrunched his nose. “I _might_ have poured baking soda in Clint’s ketchup that he keeps in his suite. “

“And?” Steve pinched the bridge of his nose.

“And it possibly kind of maybe exploded when Thor was over for breakfast and shook the bottle before he opened it?”

“So now you don’t only have a revengeful archer after you but a temperamental Norse God too.” Steve concluded with a sigh. 

“Kind of?” Tony looked even more guilty than before and even a bit terrified. 

“Care to elaborate?”

“Well Natasha was in there too…” Tony trailed off.

“Tooony!” Steve whined and gave the other man a disappointed look. “Sometimes I wonder if you actually are _trying_ to get killed.

“Oh I wouldn’t kill him.” An arctic cold voice could be heard from the door. “I would torture him first…slowly and thoroughly until he begs me to release him from the agony.”

“Eep!” Tony squeezed himself between the sink and Steve at the sight of a ketchup-drenched and fuming Natasha. 

“And then I would take over and use you as a moving practice target.” Clint, who naturally dropped himself from an air duct just on the other side of them, added with a grim expression on his face.

“I had to revenge Dummy! You disconnected him and turned him into a jelly-cube!” Tony pointed an accusatory finger at Clint but retracted it quickly when the ketchup-covered archer took a threatening step forward.

“I refuse to be in the middle of this prank-war of yours.” Steve muttered and started to walk away but Tony hanged on to his back and refused to let go. “But you are my booooyfriend! Shouldn’t you protect me from harm?”

“Not when it’s self inflicted Tony.”

“What about a husband then?”

“Hey, that’s not fair! You can’t just  mmph! – “ Clint cried out but got cut off by a big hand plastered against his mouth from behind. 

“Uh..what?” Steve starred wide-eyed at Tony, or tried to anyway since the man still acted as a human rucksack.

“Well this was not really the way I pictured myself asking, but no time like the present right? I even have the rings!” Tony finally let go and reached into his pocket and showed the stunned man two gleaming rings. 

“Uh…of course…I mean…Yes!” Steve stuttered and broke out in the most brilliant smile almost blinding Tony with its brightness before he was spun around pinned to the front of his newly made fiancé.  After a few seconds they were plucked up by two huge arms and a slightly more red and sticky Thor hugged them both tightly. “Congratulations friend Anthony and Steven! I would be honored to be a witness to this sacred bond!”

“I think that can be arranged.” Tony smiled when he finally could feel the floor under his feet again. 

“I’m happy for you.” Natasha got up on her toes and kissed Steve’s cheek. “You _will_ pay for that stunt later Stark.” She threatened but kissed him lightly on the forehead and then dragged a tantrum-flailing Clint out the door.  

“I must tell friend Bruce this joyful news, oh and call Jane!” Thor walked out from the kitchen talking to no one special.

“You’re sneaky.” Steve smirked and kissed Tony languidly.

“I most certainly don’t know what you’re talking about.” Tony answered a bit dazed. 

“I will _not_ include _“protect my husband when he’s over his head in prank-wars”_ in my vows.   

“Aww killjoy!” Tony huffed out but satisfied himself to snuggle into the warm embrace of his husband to be. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, quite a lot of fluff in the end but what can I say? Looove fluff. ;)
> 
> Oh, I love kudos and comments too btw. :) Thank you for reading!


End file.
